I am a visceral person. Touch, smell, sound are all inexorably linked to places, people, feelings. It has become really obvious to me in the last week or so that I will never be able to rid myself of these associations. Honestly, I don't really want to. I love the feeling that I get in my stomach when I hear a belt come out of belt loops. I literally throb and get wet when I hear the sound of a butterfly knife. These sounds bring up people and places, memories of things that I am pretty sure I don't want to get rid of. Some are good, some are bad, but all of them have had a significant part in shaping me into the person I am today. I like the person that I am right now. I am certainly not perfect. There are lots of things that I am going to continue to work on improving. However, I like me. I don't know if this makes me crazy or sick, but I don't want to get rid of my memories. I love the way that sound feels.
Rose
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