Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Irritating and Needy vs. Desired and Productive

Vincent and I communicate differently.  He is concise and brief, a decide and move on kind of guy.  I talk things to death and then continue to beat them until they are a gelatinous puddle.  Combine that with the fact that we have had times in our relationship when we really didn't want to say anything to each other and it creates a problem with me internally.

We have really been focusing on communication and one of his big things is that I cannot shut down on him.  I have to tell him what is going on in my head and heart.  When I don't tell him things I get bitter and nasty.  The problem is that I always question whether he actually wants to hear what I have going on inside.

I desperately don't want him to be frustrated and irritated every time I open my mouth.  I don't want him thinking, "What now?"

He has repeatedly told me that he wants me to tell him everything.  So why is it that every time I have something in my I head the first thing I think is that I would just be annoying him by sharing it with him?  Why do I have such a hard time telling him everything?

Am I being irritating and needy or is what I have to say desired and productive?  I suppose that the only way to know is to ask, and then trust what he tells me is the truth.  Yeah the second part is going to be the toughest.


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